I gots bigger plans than trees." "For the last time I can get more money!" I pleaded but Bigwig wasn't having none of it as he had his men throw me off the balcony. You and your store stand in the way of progress." Bigwig then took a big ole puff from a big ole cigar as he then continued with, "as a matter of fact, your store makes zero profit. Bigwig pointed accusingly at me as he said, "now listen here and listen well, for here's a reason I may tell. Bigwig eyed two of his gorilla henchmen and had me tilted over the balcony. Now our story all begins a few nights ago, I was summoned to Mayor Bigwig's Villa over in Kingsmill, and I was given a brief tour of the establishment until we eventually reached the balcony. The amusement park was to be called, "Wiggy Got Gum." The front door to the park would be shaped like the Mayor's face and when he opened his mouth DISGUSTING gas would come out in order to mimic the Mayor's notorious bad breath. When it became clear to Bigwig that my store was making zero profit, he felt that it would be best to instead demolish my store and put an amusement park in it's place. Aside from being Mayor, Bigwig was also a pretty accomplished and well established property developer who had bigger plans than trees you could say. Please do bare in mind that this happened like a decade ago, but Bigwig isn't very intelligent as he known to hold grudges for minor things like that. Bigwig hates me because my old bulldog took a dump in his garden. Just one hill in our fine town has stayed the same, and that's the hill that bares Bigwig's name. Sadly, the CEX makes way more profit than I do as they are known to receive a lot of support from our esteemed leader Mayor Bigwig. I also had a lot of competition in the area with a CEX located across the street, and if you don't know what that store is well look it up son or daughter or maybe even aubergine. Oh buggering buggerton! I really should have mentioned that part earlier. I named the shop Cabbages And Kings after a plaque located at my favourite restaurant which reads, "When On The Roads To Become Cabbages And Kings." Sadly, my store makes very little profit due to the fact I am known to be a hard bargainer as well as the fact I had placed my dearest plant Audrey Ii in charge of security. After losing Crash 2, I tried my best to get my life back on track by buying my very own video game rental store in Suffolk. This caused the flies to get really fat and lazy. It probably a good thing too as I had gotten so hooked to Crash 2 that I stopped eating and left my meals outside in the blazing Sun where the flies would no doubt eat it. This ultimately resulted in my pet Venus fly trap eating my childhood copy of the game as I was constantly neglecting to feed it some flies. I was known to put my love for Crash 2 above all of the really important things in my life. I played it more than any game I've ever owned which greatly angered the people I hold close to me in my life. I poured countless hours into that game when I was a young man trying to find my place in the vast world of business. My favourite game in the series would have to be Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back. I own every single game including the really terrible ones like Crash Of The Titans and Mind Over Mutant. It is by far my favourite video game franchise of all time. Don't sweat forget it and enjoy the show! I am a massive fan of The Crash Bandicoot series. You know, there's something you should know. Written by Oliver Charles/Bruno Tattagllia
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